I’ve railed until I’m hoarse about the stupidity of the consumerist principle. I’ve even spotlighted some of the stupidest food/kitchen gadgets I’ve ever come across. Now, I’ve found yet another waste of steel and paint I can’t help but expose…
In previous posts, from previous years, I’ve decried the existence of such dumbo ‘toys’ as carrot Sharpeners, Herb Scissors and Electric Pepper and Parmesan grinders. But this year, YAHOO! Style wised me up to an all-new useless gadget – featured as the headliner of it’s ‘Amazon Canada Cyber Week’ best-of reviews post.
It’s another triumph of modern Hamilton Beach (HB) engineering. A down-sized waffle iron with special ‘irons’ designed to not only cook, but assemble the perfect Breakfast Sandwich.
Yes, it’s cute. It’s tiny enough that it wouldn’t take up much space on you already-overcrowded counter. And it makes for you in ‘under 5 minutes’ what you could get at the Drive-Thru in under two.
And rather than letting someone else make your Breakfast McMuffin or Biscuit, you have to make it yourself. And clean up afterwards.
Opinion divided…
Opinion on the ‘Total Set-And-Forget Breakfast Maker’ among early adopters (who’ve commented on Amazon), run from raves to reservations.
“It’s perfect!” says one reviewer. “It’s brilliant!” raves another. It’s, “easy to use, quick and easy to clean up,” chimes in a third.
One possibly-cogent comment: “It ‘saves me money’ because I buy my own ingredients. […] I have control over what goes into my sandwich nutrition-wise.” (We’ll unpack that one a little later in the post.)
But there are definitely detractors…
Some point out it can ‘leak a lot’ (the liquid egg, and bacon/ham fat), and caution that it only allows for, ” [a] very limited amount of ingredients.” That, after HB and Amazon trumpet the fact that you can ‘customize’ your sandwich to your heart’s content.
My take
I have identified other drawbacks I’d be glad to point out. Like, you’ll be tempted to use your hands to manip-ulate the device, but you’ll risk serious burns unless you remember the stack of 4 custom irons operates at nearly 400 F. And HB doesn’t include a purpose-designed spatula/lifter.
But the real red herring in the Sandwich maker scenario is the financial side. To get started in the Breakfast Sandwich business, you’ll have to buy:
Cheese: The smallest packet of sliced American (Processed) cheese at my local supermarket is 410 grams for $6.64.
Eggs: A dozen standard (large) eggs today is $4.18 – the lowest price among literally dozens of choices, topping out at over $9.00 for ‘organic brown’, or ‘Omega-3’ varieties.
Ham/Bacon/Sausage: Bacon is a flat $10.00 for a 375 gram package. But you’ll use only 1 slice per sandwich…
Biscuits/Buns: Many choices at many prices. But I’ll cite ‘Original English Muffins’ (House Brand, in plain or multi-grain) at 6 for $3.69.
Your total initial outlay will come to just over $24.00.
Prorating the price of each component based on how much of it is needed for one serving, the cost of your first home-made breakfast sandwich will come out to $3.85. You can veer into McD’s Drive-Thru lane on the way to work and get the Real Deal for about $4.00, depending on where you live.
And you’ll have to go back to the store for more English muffins after the first six…
Just saying…
~ Maggie J.