Professional bartenders weigh in today with their ‘black list’ of things customers should never say to their booze server… The factor common to almost all comments listed is that the customer is making what could be – and often are – erroneous assumptions!
The old rule of retail, “The customer is always right,” has given way to a new order – in which customers and servers are expected to treat each other with equal respect. I don’t see anything wrong with that. In fact, having in my youth been a server, myself, I applaud it.
“Brain in gear…
… Before mouth in motion,” is also a familiar old rule. And it applies just as much as, or more than ever today.
There may be no better forum in which to demonstrate how import this rule of etiquette is than the restaurant. Servers and bartenders may be the most-abused workers in the hospitality industry.
The worst offenders
Professional bartenders consulted by Lauren Thomann at Real Simple agreed on these 7 stingers…
“SO… What’s your real job?”
“So, what’s your dream job?” Or, “Are you going to school for something else?” These highly-personal questions assume that bartending is only suitable as a temporary job, says Brynn Smith, bar-tender and Beverage Director at a swanky uptown watering hole. “Many of us, myself included, choose this as a long-term career.”
“Make it extra strong”
When ordering your drink, think twice before asking if your bartender can make it stronger (i.e.- rim the shot), add less ice, or whatever without expecting to pay more for it. “When someone asks this, they’re basically asking the bartender to steal from their employer,” Smith says. Yes, profit margins on alcohol are among the highest in any resto or bar business model. But in today’s tight market, every milliliter is carefully measured.
“Where’s the booze?”
“If you can’t taste the alcohol, it’s usually a sign of a well-balanced cocktail,” says Sam Wood, bar-tender and owner of a Denver, Colorado drinking spot. “The goal is to highlight flavor, not overwhelm it.” Trust your bartender. They want you to enjoy a drink that tastes great and feels just right… Their tip depends on it!
“Surprise me!”
“A bartender who is passionate about their craft loves to give recommendations and guide their guests to find the perfect cocktail to meet the moment,” says Charlotte Voisey, executive director of Tales of the Cocktail Foundation. “The best bartender will naturally love to engage and converse, she admits, yet they still need a little direction.” But injecting the ‘surprise me’ factor can put a lot of unnecessary and unwanted pressure on the mixologist.
“Can you give me one on the house?”
“Never ask a bartender for a free drink,” says Voicey. Comping a customer is rarely within their power. And, in most cases, they end up paying for it themselves. Again, asking for a free drink can put a lot of unnecessary and unwanted pressure on the mixologist.
“Can you make this the way [the bar down the street] makes it?”
“We love hearing what you enjoy elsewhere,” says Wood. “But every bar has its own recipes, ingred-ients, and style, so it might not taste exactly the same.” Wood notes that most bartenders would be happy to make something inspired by another cocktail, or recommend something similar from their menu that fits the vibe.But asking them to make it a competitor’s way is an out-and-out insult!
“Hey, bartender!”
Hailing a bartender for service by shouting, snapping your fingers or whistling is strongly frowned upon by all bar staff. On the other hand… “We see you,” says Wood. “A simple smile or eye contact works wonders. Bartenders juggle a lot at once, and a little patience goes a long way toward great service and maybe even a few extra friendly pours.”
My take
Add to ‘erroneous assumptions’, a general lack of courtesy. Like love, respect and training your dog, ordering a drink in a bar is a classic two-way street!
~ Maggie J.