Cement Muffin - © 2020 defec.tive via TikTok

Totally Nutty Food Stories Defy Even My Imagination!

Maybe the COVID-19 lock down is bringing out the nuttiest of the nutty on social media. But I suspect that these totally crazy extreme food stories would have surfaced at some point or other even if the current ‘too much free time on their hands’ situation did not prevail…

So, what happened? Did a bakery blow up?

Bread On Lawn - © 2020 @nellievacarciuc via TikTokIt’s not the incredibly moronic waste of food you’re thinking it is…

The video linked above clearly shows what happens when someone has been sitting at home too long, with too much free time on their hands. Or does it? Contributor @nellievacarciuc clarified the whole thing after her TikTok post drew massive negative feedback. Turns out the bread was destined to feed the family’s chickens:

“Someone sold all the bread to my dad for less than $30,” she wrote. “He laid them out to dry for the animals [because] bread goes bad in bags fast.”

Okay. But it still blows the first-time viewer away – and encourages erroneous assumptions.

McD’s Muffin defies attempts to eat it

Concrete McDs Muffin - © 2020 @defec.tive via Tik TokYou have to see this one to believe it…

“McDonald’s must be playing a prank on me,” TikTok user @defec.tive taunted the Burger Behemoth in her post. TikTok fans chimed in immediately:

“That’s not a Muffin that’s a rock,” one commentor opined.

“Looks like they accidentally put cement in it instead of flour,” another speculated.

“That’s a weapon at this point,” yet another proclaimed.

But anonymous and former McDonald’s employees confirmed, the ‘concrete’ McMonster was probably real:

“When I worked at McDonald’s they just got us to cover the leftover Muffins when we closed and then keep selling them,” one former employee said.

“They’re frozen until [the] morning of use,” another exclaimed. “If you go [in] early when they’re still defrosting, they should’ve told you and heated it up for you.”

Maybe. But this one looks like it was discovered in an ancient Egyptian tomb after sitting there for at least a few thousand years!

My take

“There are more things in heaven and Earth, Horatio / Than are dreamt of in your philosophy,” Hamlet told his best buddy in Act 1, Scene 5 of Shakespeare’s famous Danish play. And the foregoing are just a couple of them.

We’ll be sticking to making our own Bread and Muffins, thank you…

~ Maggie J.