When ‘creativity’ goes too far, it crosses a line, and enters the warped, creepy realm of the nasty – a dark place where folks who get enjoyment from the distress and pain of others revel in cruel practical jokes and hurtful deceptions. There’s truly a special place in Hell for these sadists.
Well, well…
Another of my predictions has come true: we’re seeing the emergence of a entire lines of ‘trick’ Holiday treats designed to sour folks’ festive spirits. As far as I can see, the only redeeming quality of which is that they help us separate the sociopaths from the common-and-garden variety sillies.
Remember the Hallowe’en ‘novelty’ Doughnut we posted about a little while ago, that featured what looks like Strawberry Icing and Cinnamon Sprinkles but turns out to be a veritable Hell-Cake riddled with the Hottest Chili Peppers known to humanity? I questioned not only the wisdom but the sanity of floating such a product in the first place. Then, there was an editorial by another Food Blog asking if Hot Pepper was the ‘new Official Flavour of Hallowe’en?’
Now, the first of what may be another disgusting trend in Seasonal foods has raised its ugly head.
Not one, but many potential disappointments
An outfit called Archie McPhee (‘We make Wierd’) has launched a seasonal line of trick Candy Canes. Expecting a sweet, fruity-familiar flavour? Sorry. The Red isn’t Strawberry; it Ketchup. The Light Green isn’t Lime; it’s Kale. And the Dark Green isn’t Mint; it’s Pickle. Yuk.
Even knowing what was coming, just the thought of such ‘Candy’ flavours would make me screw up my nose and spit out the offending material into the first potted plant I could find. And make me wonder if I shouldn’t question my choice in ‘friends’. Getting a nasty surprise when I picked one off of the Tree or out of a festive bowl at a party would shock and nauseate me.
And what a nasty trick to pull on children, who might carry such a psychic scar on their whole concept of Christmas for the rest of their lives as a result.
Why this ‘madcap’, hilarious’ novelty food strikes me so negatively is probably at least in part the thought that mixing sour-spicy-earthy flavours with sweet (the Canes, themselves are still made of pure Sugar, after all) is just too much for my tortured consciousness to deal with.
What we really need…
… Is a truly comforting, familiar reminder of the cozier, simpler, more comforting Christmases of our childhoods, when we still had the magic of Santa Claus and fresh snow on Holiday lights, and the all-encompassing trust in our parents to make our family a Christmas celebration that was true to our beloved family traditions and expectations….
On a more serious level… As I’ve said, I think that receiving a trick-flavoured Candy Cane would not only leave me with a bad taste in my mouth; it would leave me with doubts about what kind of ‘friend’ would serve me such a thing…
~ Maggie J.