The Bag of Lettuce 'Burger'- © McDonald's

Build Your Own Burger (Monstrosity)?

Remember when we told you about the McDonald’s pilot project testing a ‘Build Your Own Burger’ ordering system? They chose New Zealand as the location and that’s the last we heard about it. Until now. Seems the pranksters came out in droves with some downright loopy suggestions…

The Hawaiian Hula Burger - © McDonald's

If you could ‘Build Your Own Burger’ using the standard McDonald’s ingredients, what would you choose? How many Patties/Chicken Breasts? How many layers of Lettuce? What Condiments and how much? The possibilities – at least in terms mere humans can comprehend – are endless.

To get customers used to building their own, McDonald’s set up an online contest asking folks to build virtual Burgers and give them appropriate names. Many of the customer concoctions were creative and delicious-looking. But some of the orders were absolutely goofy. Others were political statements.

Take, for instance, the Bernie’s Socialist Feast (pictured at left) – a reference to a recent, much talked about poll of Kiwis on the U.S. presidential election race. Some 82 per cent of New Zealanders said they would vote for Clinton; fewer than 10 per cent said they’d choose Trump. Defeated candidate for the Republican nomination Bernie Sanders was preferred overwhelmingly over Trump, in spite of his socialist tendencies. The Bernie Burger? A top and bottom Bun with nothing in between.

Another suggestion was a mammoth 10-ingredient construction called the Hawaiian Hula. Yes, it has Pineapple. And Chipotle Mayo. And Brie Cheese. And, since you pay by the ingredient in the build Your Own universe, the thing – if you really ordered it – would cost about (C)$15. / (US)$12. Are you really that hungry?

Other goofy meals included the Bag of Lettuce – just a huge stack of Lettuce – and the Atheist’s Delight: Nothing at all. The Carbonator consisted of a stack of Buns – 4 bottoms and 4 tops. I was especiallt inrtigued to fone quite a number of fantasy Burgers which used a couple of slices of Lettuce top and bottom instead of a Bun.

I referred to these way-out Sammies in the past tense because McDonald’s New Zealand has taken down the contest website and has no comment on when it might be back up. Probably never. But the humour site Dorkly has preserved some of the more inappropriate examples of the Burger builder’s art. Good old Dorkly!

~ Maggie J.