I just read an opinion piece in this morning’s paper calling out Vegans and Vegetarians over their current mania for the new ‘Meat substitutes’ made from Vegetable Proteins, but painstakingly made to look and taste like Meat. As writer L.D. Cross rightly points out, their behaviour is, well, just plain odd…
The product that started it all: Beyond Meat was first to commercially market a
a Veggie Protein Mat substitute. It now claims the lion’s share of a
fast-growing market and recently became the first faux-
Meat company to go public on the Stock Exchange.
Until I read Cross’ op-ed I had never stopped to consider how odd it is that non-Meat eaters love ‘fake Meat’ so much. Why not just eat the Rice and Beans, and Lentils and Quinoa and Tofu and be done with it? Cross spares no philosophies or feelings, branding the movement ‘foodie flim-flam’.
“If you believe eating Meat is cruel, stresses the environment or contributes to chronic ailments, then why sculpt faux burgers, ribs, roasts and steaks out of veggies and grains to imitate the very animal flesh you profess to abhor? Seems counterintuitive to me. As a species we evolved as omnivores, but I get it that you don’t eat meat. Go ahead, do you. What I don’t get is this obsession with creating stuff to look like meat. You gave it up, remember?”
I say, yes, they definitely remember. Right down to their ancestral memories. Vegetarians can evolve intellectually to forsake Meat for the humanitarian and environmental reasons they so often cite for their choice, but they can’t shake their deeply ingrained preference for foods that look, smell and taste like Meat.
Creative linguistics
Cross also complains about the lengths Vegetarians and Vegans – and the marketing types who want to cater to them – will go to maintain the cultural and linguistic links between new Vegetable Protein products and real Meat:
“A quick guide to speaking vegan includes ‘crumble’ referring to a crunchy texture masquerading as bacon bits or ground beef. ‘Toona’ is sham seafood from soy and veggie protein. A ‘flegg’ is a non-egg made from flax meal and water. Soy or almond ‘milk’ is a bogus bovine beverage of plant juice. Real milk comes from cows that eat plants. For Christmas, combine flegg with that beverage to make nutnog. It goes with that imposter gobbler called ‘Tofurky’. Should vegan bacon be called ‘vacon’? Or, is that just more phoney baloney? Is non-dairy cheese called ‘teese’ or ‘sheese’? Whatever it is, it is not cheese. Sort of reminiscent of that venerable iridescent processed goop in a bottle called Cheez Whiz, isn’t it?”
Maybe he goes too far mocking earnest non-Meat eaters, but he makes a telling point: “[B]y constructing copycat meat, vegetarians are secret meatarians. Just enjoy fruit and veggie fodder unaccompanied by reminders of past carnivore chow. Otherwise, cut the herbivore hype.”
Harsh words, indeed. But these days, anyone who wants to be heard above the din over the latest fad has to speak out and speak loud.
My take
For all his rancor (whether toungue-in-cheek or not) over ‘secret meatarians’, Cross conveniently ignores the hard fact that we must all move away from Meat and toward Vegetable Protein in our diets or much of the world will be starving by 2050 simply because we can’t produce enough to feed everybody. And Climate Change will still be accelerating, making things even worse. Whether we prefer Veggie products that mimic Meat or just go with the basic Veggie Protein sources, we must all get used to the new regime. If ‘fake Meat’ makes the transition easier for the hard-core carnivores among us, then let them have it.
~ Maggie J.