We all know about the ‘classic’ and ‘standard’ hangover cures, any and all of which are commonly called upon for relief by folks who over-imbibed New Year’s Eve. But there are some others out there – many in fact – that have too long gone underappreciated…
A classic American cure: Clearly created by a devotée
of the ‘counter irritant’ theory…
In the 1958 rom-com Teacher’s Pet, perennial sidekick player Gig Young’s character regales his new pal, played by Clark Gable, with the grizzly details of his favourite hangover cure. He says he learned it from the shaman of a primitive tribe somewhere in the jungle, and the final ingredient is a raw Egg:
“It’s supposed to be a lizard’s Egg.” *Sighs* “Well, you can’t have everything!”
If you think that’s gruesome, wait ’til you hear about some of the other absolutely nutty notions I’ve dug up…
But first, what Science says…
The folks at Healthline.com have compiled a list of hangover cures (and things you can do to avoid one) which are generally accepted as valid by the scientific and medical establishments…
- Limit your Alcohol consumption. Duh!
- Choose clear booze. Spirits such as Vodka, Gin and Rum are low in ‘congenors’, toxic compounds that are formed during the fermentation process which makes Alcohol from Sugars. Tequila, Whiskies and Cognac are high in the bad stiff. Bourbon is worst.
- Eat a hearty breakfast. If you can. Depends, I guess on the character and intensity of your morning after malaise.
- Get plenty of sleep. Fatigue can result in sleep interruptions and poor quality sleep. If you’re weak from lack of rest, a hangover can hit even harder.
- Stay hydrated. Booze of all kinds – Spirits, Wine, Beer – acts as a diuretic. Dehydration just makes the effects of a hangover more in tense and makes getting over one take longer.
- There’s more, but I’ll leave that to you, if you’re so moved.
Now comes the interesting stuff…
Gizmondo.com lists some of the oddest hangover cures it’s found, by culture. How about rubbing a slice of Bacon into the pit of your drinking arm? Or a big bowl of nice, greasy Poutine? Or chew on a Bull’s Penis? You can see where this is going…
Buzzfeed.com, which revels in the ridiculous polled kits fans and came up with a list of food-based hangover cures. One reader proposed taking a beverage consisting of Gatorade, Vitamin C and Alka-Seltzer – to wash down a Double Bacon Cheese Burger. Another recommended Beef Ramen with Sriracha Sauce and Flamin’Hot Cheetos – presumably to burn the demons out of your system. Pickle Juice and Cold Chinese Food were both highly rated. Asian Soups in general had many advocates. One respondent even suggested simply dissolving a spoonful of Salt and a spoonful of Sugar in a glass of Water and drinking it down in a single draught. My take? That last ‘cure’ would probably purge any remnants of the previous nights excesses from your stomach, sending them back out the way they came in.
Lifehack.com compiled a list of weird hangover cures from a wide variety of sources. Among the weirder ones: a pair of Pickled Sheep’s Eyeballs in a glass of Tomato Juice, A Deep-Fried Canary, and a shot of Sparrow Droppings in Brandy. Really. You can’t make this stuff up!
Some celebrity hangover hacks…
Glamour Magazine polled high-profile celebs -possibly because they may be assumed to over-do more frequently than the unwashed masses – to share their hangover cures. Julia Roberts says the secret is to, “find a balance between Champagne and Carrot Juice.” Dr. Oz swears by the Pickle Juice cure, claiming that Salt and Vinegar will help replace depleted electrolytes and help you get rehydrated. Hugh Grant is a fan of the hearty breakfast. He told the Herald Sun, in 2009, “After a night out on the town, I find a plateful of Spaghetti Bolognese works wonders for me.” And Royal party pro Prince Harry says a Strawberry Milkshake is just the ticket to tame a hangover.
That’s just the tip of the post-tipsy iceberg…
You’ll find many more links to wild and crazy remedies just by Googling ‘weird hangover cures’.
My take…
Don’t get hammered in the first place. And definitely don’t try to drive if you’ve consumed any Alcohol at all. Drunk driving laws are becoming more and more onerous each year. You can be charged in my home province even if you don’t blow over the statutory limit. It’s just not worth risking it. So, go out and party with a designated driver lined up, or stay home and drink. Either way, we’ve got you covered…
~ Maggie J.